A different pace

 

 

                   

 

Thank you to each and everyone of you who have been and will continue to pray for Matt and Emily and their girls. I'ev had some emails asking about how "I'm doing" and what is going on in my life, so I thought I'd answer that.

I'm doing ok. Seriously I've cried a lot the last few days and I know my tears don't even measure Emily's. When you've lost a child, you don't want that for anyone else...even your worst enemy, much less one of your best friends. I am kind of at a loss for words in many ways when it comes to this subject. I know that seems humorous to some of you, but well even when you've lost a child, you still don't know exactly what to say. Some people want to hear "I'm sorry" and recieve the hugs", then there are some who like me just get sick of it and think if I hear that one more time or if one more person touches me I'm going to slap them silly. I was one of those latter people. It was exhausting that whole week from the time Jordyn died until her funeral and burial. So anyways...I've dealt with a lot of feelings that I just wish Emily didn't have to deal with.

 

                     

 

Pregnancy wise, I'm feeling good well as good as a 33 almost 34 week pregnant woman can feel. I'm starting to have a good amount of discomfort in many places from my back aching at the end of the day to stretching of ligaments and unmentionable places, which is rather painful. But all the discomfort in the world is worth it. I have felt so blessed from the beginning of this pregnancy. I have had baby fevor for a couple years, so when we got pregnant so quickly I was truly so excited and just praise God for the blessing he gave our family. I think Jackson doesn't really believe a baby is ever going to come out of this deal! Hard to understand at 3 yrs old! But in 3 or 4 weeks she's going to be here! That is also amazing. This pregnancy has just flown by. I can't believe I'm almost done with this pregnancy. None of them have went by so quickly.

                       

 

We're still working on a name. I have a favorite name and Chad says it's fine but there's some strings attached to it that I need to cover first. Either way you won't find out until she's here and I know I've probably just totally annoyed Miss Kelly for bringing it up again, but well suck it up woman! Of course my other Kelly's Green Olives & Pickle Juice thinks it's fun to give me suggestions. She's a brat but I love her anyways! LOL I'm NOT naming her after you! ;)

                        

 

The boys are doing great. Jacob had a friend sleep over last night. I actually went and picked "S" up from school. He is an Army kid, but goes to a German school. He's a year older than Jacob, but they get along so great. He's just a really great boy. His mom had a drs apt 20 minutes before his school let out, so she knew there'd be no way she'd make it to get him, especially since her apt was in another part of town at that! Jacob and "S" were thrilled that they were going to have a playdate! By the time "S" mom came they'd asked if he could stay longer, both of us mom's were fine with it. She took her little "E" home for a nap and my 2  boys and "S" played for a few more hours and then Jacob came out to ask if "S" could spend the night. I called his mom and she was fine with it, excited that he got invited. She brought his clothes over later that evening and the kids had a great time playing. They played hard too. They all ate dinner so good. My boys are good eaters, but normally one serving is all they do unless it's something like pizza or mac and cheese (Mac and Cheese being Jacob's favorite!) they'll eat 2nd of but that's normally about it. Last night I made Miny Cheddar loaves (meat loaf), mashed potatoes, and corn. Yes I know 2 starches. Jack got 2nds of EVERYTHING. He's been an off and on kid on mashed potatoes and normally isn't much of a corn eater unless it's corn on the cob. He scarfed it all down and asked for more of everything and cleaned his plate up again. "S" got more mashed potatoes and corn. Jacob got more meatloaf and they all ate everything! We were all stuffed after dinner, but it was good! Next time I make the mini cheddar loaves I'm going to make them in the muffin pan. I got the recipe from my friend Tami's cookbook. It's not that much different than my meatloaf, the big difference is it has an actual sauce that goes over it and mine's just ketchup...both are great and I like them both equally, there's just a slight taste difference! Anyways later last night I was having a craving and my dear  husband went out and curbed it for me...I wanted chocolate ice cream with chocolate sauce. So off he went to the shoppette and bought an over-price half-gallon of ice cream and choc. syrup for me! LOL He had a bowl too, man it was good. The only bad part is...I am all stuffed up and well you know what happens when you're stuffed up the taste of foods are altered and although I didn't notice it so much with dinner, with the ice cream it was REALLY noticeable. It's allergies, and man are they messing with me. It started off with a horrible sore throat. That was on Thursday and I actually woke up not able to talk. As the day went on it got better, but was really, really sore. I had soup for lunch and mashed potatoes for dinner that night. Friday the throat was 95% better, but the stuffiness and itchy eyes had started. Since moving to Germany I've hardly had any allergy issue's, which has been great, but well what ever it is in the air that I'm allergic to is out big time. It's been so cool here and rainy. Don't hate me because of our insane weather. I'm used to hot, miserable summers. Heck we kept being warned that this was going to be an awful summer (hot and humid) so we went and bought an a/c...we've hardly used it. I'm thankful I'm not hot and miserable, but dang on the money we spent on that a/c if we don't end up hardly needing it this year. Of course we still have more summers to come before moving back to the states before we sell it (it's 220 volt we won't be taking it back to the states!). Oh for those wondering what I mean by "SummerS" we're planning on staying an additional 3 yrs here. We love it here and well 3 yrs is just not enough! So for now the plan is to stay here 6 full years.There's a good chance Chad will be deploying next year so we'd have been here an additional year anyways. If we do the COT, the Army will pay for our whole family to go back to the states for 30 days (they pay for the plane tickets and Chad gets a FREE 30 days of leave) can't beat that...so we'll go back and spend a couple weeks with my family and a couple with Chad's and see some friends (Tami, Kelly, and Emily) for sure while there...they may have to drive to see us, but when the time comes we'll figure that all out. It'll be the first time most likely that our families will meet our daughter as well. I'm hoping my parents or at least my mom can come over at some point before we go back for a visit and meet our little girl. I really wish she could be here when she's born, but it doesn't look like that will happen. Wish it would though. I'm glad they came in May though, so I just need to accept that gift and move on. But hey if she does come back it's nice to know I'll have some extra help with house keeping most of all laundry! :) hehe!!

 

 

                   

 

Speaking of laundry I've managed to get behind on that junk again. I just hate laundry. I have always hated it and it just does not help that the laundry room is in the basement and we're on the 3rd floor. But I need to get down there tomorrow and get some washed. Chad will be home so he can help me carry it up and down the stairs. I have two baskets that need to be put away.

Tomorrow my plan so far is:

Church then lunch

Laundry (at least 4 loads if not more)

Put laundry away

Have Chad take the suitcases back to the storage room (they've been up since May when my parents were here. They're empty just need to go back downstairs).

Have the boys clean up the playroom, which isn't horrible, but it's not good.

I need to vacuum...the playroom, our bedroom, living and dining rooms, and the boys bedrooms. Those are the only rooms that have carpet..so ultimately every room.

I want to make a pot of beans so in the morning I need Chad to bring up a  hamhock from the deep freezer so that before we leave for church I can get those going. That will make for a good, but very easy dinner!

We need to make a commissary run. I need to make out a menu for the next 2 weeks as well so we only get what we need at the commissary.

We need to pull out Jordyn's old clothes for this little girl so that this week I can get those sorted through and washed up. Thankfully I was GREAT about seperating them (in sizes) so all we have to do is find her newborn stuff and bring it up here so I can get it all washed up and put away.

 

                

 

This week Chad has Wed and Thursday off for the 4th of July holiday. For the 4th we'll be going to our post celebration. They do a great job and it was a lot of fun last year, it'll be better this year with Chad home! They have tons of jump houses, bull riding, paint gun (the boys will not be doing this), dunk tank, and other games for the kids (and adults), food, and drinks concessions. I need to double check on what time it all starts. I think this year it's planned to start later than it did last year. I know it started earlier than 4 pm last year, but I'm pretty sure that's the time they have been advertising for it to start this year. The night will end with fireworks. Last year they didn't start til about 11 pm, because that's when it got dark. It may start earlier this year since the weather's been so odd and it's been getting dark around 10 or 10:30. We'll see! I need to go look at what the weather is supposed to be like next week. My luck it'll be hotter than you can get out and it'll be fairly miserable day for me! LOL I'll suck it up and just drink tons of water (although I'm already drinking tons, we may have to bring a cooler for me and keep it in the car so I can go fill up my water bottle so we're not constantly buying water.)

 

 

            

 

Thursday I have my ob apt. It's my next to last one scheduled. I "think" I'll have my 3-D u/s. I'm hoping Chad can go with me and the boys as well. We have the Culligan man coming with our new cooler so someone has to be here, but I'm going to see if my friend Bobbie can come over and wait for him if he's not come before we leave so we don't miss out. Although I think we're supposed to sign the contract that day, so not quite sure how that will work. I will have to call on Monday and find out and see if we can get a more pinned down time for him and see if they will work with us. IF I have the 3-D u/s I do NOT want to see her face. I've seen enough of them from others to say that you can TELL what they look like. I figure that's the only surprise I have left. Honestly they freak me out a little too. They are so insanely detailed! I already know she's most likely going to look at least very similar to our other 3 children, but there is still differences and well I don't want to see those differences before she's here! Heck I'll only have 3 or 4 more weeks to wait and see them live and in person the way it is! :) But I'll happily take a look at her hands and feet and hopefully if she's cooperating reassurance that she's definately a girl! LOL My ob has a very high success rate on being right with u/s and I have had 2 where she had great, clear shots of her. But to have a 3-D shot of that will be one more reassurance! LOL

Well I know this is not too exciting of an entry...but well life's not always full of exciting stuff. It's the everyday little things that makes life I think. But there are big things and you all know as I've been asking all week for prayers for them...the big thing in our life right now is my friend Emily and their loss of their little 5 day old daughter Miller Grace (btw this is her 1st name...Miller Grace. It is NOT 1st and middle). Right at this moment her visitation is happening so please be in prayer for them.

Another friend of Emily's, emailed me and we're going to donate a book or two in Miller Grace's memory to the library. It was her friends idea and I have to say it's a great one. When Jordyn died friends did that for Jordyn and it meant a great deal to us. To know that others would check out a book and see her name in it and maybe know a little about her. I've also ordered a book for Matt and Emily that we bought when Jordyn died, that friends of ours who's son had died told us about. It's called "Mommy, Please Don't Cry" by Linda DeYamz. We have the older version which I absolutely love. There's been a revised version that was put out in 2003, and that's the one I ordered for Emily. For some rediculous reason the older version that we have, it's going for rediculous amounts. The cheapest I could find the old version was $28.00. It's a beautiful book and Chad told me I could get which ever I wanted and I may down the road get them the old version too, but for now I got her the new one. The illustrations in the new one show a baby which well seems so appropriate. It should be to her by Wed of this coming week. Which most people in their day to day lives will have gone back to just that...their own day to day lives and Matt and Emily will be left there in the midst of everything trying to figure out what's next. So I hope that this will bring them some comfort. The book is written from a child's perspective of what Heaven is like. It's really just such a beautiful book. It's not really about how to deal with grief, because well honestly all those books that I got from VERY well meaning and loving people...just stunk. I hated them. But this book brought me such comfort. My boys love to look at it and have me read it to them. I don't pull it out all the time, but there are days I just need to. Ok so anyways....be praying for Matt and Emily right now as they wade through the next 4 hours of people paying their respects to them. Pray for them tomorrow as they say that "final" goodbye, which well isn't really final..but it's the "official" goodbye. Pray for their other two daughters as they sort through their questions, confusion, etc that a 2 and 3 yr old are sorting through and trying to make sense of all of it.

I'm off to bed. I want to do some reading before I pass out. I haven't really been able to read much the last few nights. Last night I pretty well passed out once I was in bed..I was on here chatting with Emily until after 2 am. I did get to sleep in though..until 10:30 when I woke up. I couldn't believe I slept in so late! It felt good!

 

God Bless and Thank you again for praying for and reaching out to Matt and Emily and their family. Don't forget to light those candles and pray them through today and tomorrow.

 

                    

 

 

Miller Grace

Today is Miller Grace's visitation and tomorrow is her funeral. Please be praying for Matt and Emily as they get through these two days and these emotionally and physically exhausting hours. Hold them up to Jesus.

 

 

I was able to chat online with Emily last night and a little this morning. Keep holding her up. She's holding tight to Jesus and I know he's holding tight to her. I don't know if she has any idea what a light she is. Jesus just shines out of her, even in her depths of absolute grief and sorrow. She continues to show me and teach me. There's 6 yrs difference in Emily and I, but her walk with Christ is so much more than mine and I thank him for bringing her into my life. I ask each of you today to hold their family up to God today especially from 4:00-8:00 CDT during the visitation and tomorrow at 4:00 pm during the funeral. Light a candle for them, pray for them, surround them in Christ's mercy.

 

 

 

 

Thank you

I wanted to thank all of you for reaching out to my friend during her greatest heartbreak. I did talk to her husband briefly last night and she called me in the middle of the night, but unfortunately I didn't hear the phone so she left a message.

Her faith is God is strong, yet she's still a grieving mother. So please keep her in your prayers. The pain doesn't just leave after a few days, weeks, or even months. This is a lifetime journey of grief she is on now. There will be good days and there will be the worst of worst days, and lots of in betweens where you're just not sure where you fit in.

Pray for her as the rest of the world goes back to what they see as normal life again (after the funeral, etc) and she and Matt are left with empty arms that should be filled up with Miller Grace. Pray for them as they continue to parent their other 2 daughters, and as they grieve seperately and together as man and woman/husband and wife as well as parents together and seperately. Men and women in general grieve differently. Pray for them to be gentle with each other as they deal with their grief in the way that the each individually need to, even if it makes no sense to the other one.

If you could muster a prayer for me as well, that I can be what she needs in a friend. You all have no idea how much I love Emily. I am blessed with friends I have 3 best friends, Chad (my husband), Tami, and Emily. I talk to Chad obviously every day, and Tami and Emily multiple times a week. There are weeks and months where we talk every single day, and then times where we go for a few days without talking. I want to be what she needs me to be for her, do God's will as her friend, as I continue being a wife and mother here as well. One last prayer request. Pray that the birth of our baby is not painful for Emily. I do not want my joy to be another source of pain for her.

Tags: Prayer, Grief, Family

Miller Grace update

She's with my Jordyn now, dancing with Jesus. Miller Grace left this world gently in her Momma's arms...no better place from Emily's to God's. Please keep Emily and Matt and their girls and extended family in your prayers. Praise God for the 5 1/2 precious days that Miller Grace was on this earth.

Visit Miller Grace's website:

www.caringbridge.org/visit/millergracecassetty

Pray for Miller Grace

I'm so absolutely heart broken to have to write this...but Miller Grace will not be growing up in this world. In the next hours to days she'll be meeting our Lord Jesus Christ. PLEASE pray that her end to this world and her entrance to Heaven is gentle. Please pray for Emily and Matt (and their sweet girls Hope and Matilyn) that they feel God holding them tightly as he welcomes their beautiful baby.

You can go to Miller Grace's website:

www.caringbridge.org/visit/millergracecassetty

Hold them up, pray for them, remember them in your thoughts and prayers. No one should have to bury their child. No one. I'm so desperately heartbroken that one of my best friends will be far too soon.

Night

It's almost bedtime and I'm about to get off of here. The china cabinets arrived thank goodness. They didn't get here until 7 PM though! At least they came and are set up. They look really beautiful. I'll take a picture tomorrow.

I've been so uncomfortable tonight. My back is just absolutely aching and well lets just say ligiments are stretching in area's that is VERY painful and there's NOTHING I can do about it. During dinner it just was literally taking my breath away. I was almost in tears. This little girl is worth every single moment of discomfort and pain, but dang! I know I am blessed that I never experienced the stretching pains with Jordyn or Jacob. With Jack I did, but it didn't hurt this bad or I've just forgotten (it's been almost 4 yrs!). She's still quite active and actually JUST kicked! :) I do love feeling her move and I will miss that once she's here, but oh I'll love having her here!

 

I still have to watch the video tonight before I go to bed. It's not long though. I did get all the reading I needed done earlier. Chad's been hogging the tv all evening though and well in about 4 minutes I'm taking it to watch the dvd so I can then get in bed. I have to be up by 7:15 so I can grab a quick shower, get ready, get the boys ready, and head up to the chapel and be there by 8:15. I may have Chad drop the boys off in the morning on his way to work, he walks right by the chapel anyways so it's not out of his way and I wouldn't have to rush so much getting them ready. Making sure they're fed, dressed, etc. They'd have 30 extra minutes more! We'll see. It's supposed to rain tomorrow and I have to take the car to PWOC with me since I have to take food for breakfast up to the chapel.

Well...I hope all of you have a good evening. I'm off to watch my dvd, spend some time in prayer, and then get some sleep.

 

God Bless

 

 

Procrastination

I need to watch a video for a bible study I'm teaching tomorrow and I've totally been procrastinating about it. I don't know why. Well I kind of do, I'm not really wanting to teach is the problem. I'm not enjoying this study enough to be the teacher and feel very ill-equipped to do it. Ultimately I just need to sit my butt down and do what needs to be done after some prayer. But instead I'm sitting my butt down here. :X

Emily updated about Miller Grace so please go visit her website if you haven't already and get the update. It's a lot of stuff and it's just better coming from Emily than me that's for sure. www.caringbridge.org/visit/millergracecassetty

Today I had a board meeting for PWOC. That went great. We discussed everything we needed to discuss. The kids played. I came home, made lunch, had Jacob do his school work, worked some with Jackson on his preschool work, then it was time to go to the chapel to practice the songs we're singing tomorrow. I have to make something for PWOC breakfast too. I have yet to decide what. Chad's going to get the mail in a bit, so I'm thinking of having him pick up something but I'm not sure what yet! I'm thinking of bad/yummy brownies! LOL I could use me a pan of brownies about now.

 

I'm feeling rather frustrated with Jack right now. He's just not behaved or listened well this afternoon. I know it's because he didn't get a nap in, but this is rediculous. There's a hole in the screen and he just threw a toy out it. He got a spanking. Yep I spank and if you don't like it, too bad. I'm at my wits end with him this afternoon.

I have no idea what I'm making for dinner. I have a list of things to make, we have the groceries just nothing sounds good, except for those brownies like I mentioned before! :X Most of what we have to make is more than I want to do.

There are just days when I just want to go to bed and stay there, but of course those are the days you never can!

Oh our china cabinets are supposed to be delivered today. It's 5 pm and so far they're not here and if they don't get here I'm going to scream. I've had it with these people. I'm sick and tired of being told they're coming and then they don't come. Last Tuesday I waited all freaking day for them, then the lady told Chad I "must have been mistaken" she claimed she didn't tell me the 19th, funny that's the date I wrote down when I'dcalled her to GET the date. She PROMISED Chad they'd be delivered today. She guarenteed him our living room furniture would be delivered on July 10. If not I'm going to go crazy on some people. It's seriously not smart to mess with a grumpy pregnant woman! :)

Ok, I'm off to do some praying and get started on the prep work for the bible study....

 

Monday's update

Today I woke up to an email from Emily and an update she'd written on Miller Grace's page. Miller Grace was able to take a few breaths on her own, so please keep the prayers coming. She still has so much to over come. This I know is so exhausting for Emily. She just gave birth 2 days ago and is sitting at Miller Grace's bedside, praying. Please lift up Miller Grace, Emily (mom), and Matt (dad) as they go through these trials. Nothing is too hard for God. I know that he knows what tomorrow holds for their family. I pray it's what our deep desire and prayer is, but well I just don't know.

My favorite song is "Held" by Natalie Grant and I hope Emily is feeling God hold her right now. The chorus goes like this:

 

This is what it means to be held.
How it feels when the sacred is torn from your life
And you survive.
This is what it is to be loved.
And to know that the promise was
When everything fell we’d be held.

I don't want and pray that "the sacred" is NOT torn from Emily's life, but I pray she feels that she's  being held.

 

Today also marks 7 yrs since my best friend, Tami's daughter Sydney died. Sydney was almost 13 months old. She died from neuroblastoma, another childhood cancer. Please pray for Tami and her family today as they mark 7 yrs without their beautiful Sydney Rebecca.

I know nothing cheery, but well life's not always roses and sunshine. Sometimes there's storms and overcast skies. The only thing constant in God's love for his children. I pray to Jesus above that he hears our cries.

 

I leave you with this:

Phillipians 4:6-7

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with th anksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

URGENT PRAYERS

Hi my friend Emily is in desperate need of prayers immediately. At 2:00 pm CST. Emily gave birth to Miller Grace Friday night/Saturday morning. She's beautiful and "looks" perfect. She looks JUST like her Daddy. I've been asking for prayers for them over the last few weeks. Well now that Miller Grace is here they know there's definately something wrong with her brain. She's on a vent and they're going to see if she can breath on her own, or if the part of her brain that controls her breathing will allow it or not. PLEASE, PLEASE pray that part of her brain is working.

 

You can keep updates by going to her webpage: www.caringbridge.org/visit/millergracecassetty

PLEASE go there as Emily will be able to keep you up much better and in far more detail than I will.

 

Pray that God's will be done, that he gives Emily and Matt discernment concerning Miller Grace and her care and that God will  be guiding the drs as well.

Wrestling

Jacob and Jack both participated in a once a week wrestling practice. A friend of ours who wrestled in high school and college got a group of kids together and taught them moves. Chad helped him out every week, even after surgery, although he couldn't actively show them moves. I will not include pictures of the other kids faces, but here's a few from their last practice.

Pics from Playmobil

Ok so the post that has everything all crazy is just 2nd from the bottom, so much to Kelly's dislike (hehe) I'm posting multiple posts today just to get things normal again! Thursday as I posted on Friday we spent our day at Playmobil which is about 45 minutes from us. I'm the PWOC Outreach rep and part of my responsibilities is planning the summer outings, we do one a month. So June's was to Playmobil! We had a nice turn out, there was a nasty storm the middle of the afternoon, but we just moved inside and still enjoyed our time there, here's some pictures from our day there! :)

 

 

So now I know :)

Flickr's to blame. When I placed pictures using them as the host they messed things up with how they arranged the pictures. I tried to put them in one way, but they turned out another. I am guessing once that entry goes into past entries on another page all will be fine again. Until then I'll just deal. I should go and look and see just how far from the bottom of the page it is, hopefully it's just a couple, because I'm finding it rather annoying personally!

UGH!

I can't figure out what is wrong with my journal, why it stretches out so far. Help, anyone!

Last Monday we took the boys to Engineer Lake here on post. It's a great educational park/lake here on post and the boys had a great time. They found a snail, these tiny little frogs, some beetles, and saw some very gross mice. We also fed the fish which many are small babies and then there are huge ones. I didn't get pictures of the fish, but did get pics of the boys feeding them. :) I really love the simple things in life. Spending a few hours at the lake, watching the boys play and just have fun and learn all at the same time. We're so truly blessed. Blessed with our family, blessed by our life, blessed to live in Germany, and live on the Army post we do live on.

 

 

MIA

I was MIA for a few days, but I'm back! Our internet and phone had been down since Tuesday night. I had some withdrawals but I'm all good! I was on for a couple hours earlier today, but then had to start cleaning up the kitchen and start dinner and vacuum the living room and swept the kitchen and under the bird's cage...goodness birds are a mess.

 

                         

I made chicken enchilada's tonight. They're my mom's recipe and they're great, but oh so rich and soooo fattening! :) We invited my friend Bobbie over. She has a 6 yr old son who is Jacob's best friend and then she has a 5 month old daughter. Her dh is currently deployed. She was here 3 or 4 nights this week! She's definately one of my best friends here and she lives right across the park from us so we see each other almost every day. Dinner was great and Bobbie brought dessert, chocolate pie..yum! We were all stuffed. They headed home at 11 (PM..yep! LOL). I know we can't make the deployment all better, but I know it helps to have friends to hang out with and Chad and her husband are great friends and he told her he's glad she spends time with us!

 

 

                    

Yesterday we went to Playmobil Fun Park for the day. We got there at 10 am and left there at 4:30. The last 1 1/2 hr it was pouring rain so we played indoors. We actually got stuck out side in the storm and it was bad. The rain was coming down in buckets, thunder and lightening, and the wind was really strong. We thankfully had shelter in the castle, but when it let up just a little we took off for the main building, which has tons of tables, tons of play area's with all the playmobil toy sets, and also a HUGE and I mean HUGE jungle gym (in a room that's probably 1500-2000 square feet big...it's HUGE!) so while the rain finished up, the kids played! When it finally let up we let them all go down the slides outside which are close to the gate and then we headed home! Of course we got caught in traffic so it took alittle longer, but we were home by 6 pm. Jacob went home with them and had dinner. Bobbie brought him home and stayed for an hour or two and we just all visted while the boys all 3 played.

 

 

                    

 

Wednesday we had PWOC and after that I had my ob apt. My apt went great. I'm 32 weeks pregnant and this baby girl is big. She weighs 4 lbs 6 oz right now! Yes that's right. HUGE! I'm only 8 months and she's already that big. I'm a little scared! LOL All I can say is there's comfort in knowing I do NOT and will not be pushing her out of my body! LOL I asked when I'll have my c-section and she said that they do them here anytime between the 37 and 38th week. Now to give you an idea of that, my 27th week starts July 25 and my 38th week starts August 1. The thought that she could possibly be born in July is really overwhelming to me. That's earlier than what they do in the US, which is normally 39 weeks. So in 5 to 6 weeks we're going to have a little girl in our midst! This pregnancy has really gone by so quickly. I know that's rare for a pregnant woman to say, but it really has. I really can't complain about this pregnancy. I had some morning sickness and trust me that was no picnic, but I KNOW it could have been worse. I have had some sciatic nerve issue's, but it was worse with Jackson, so again it could have definately been worse. I had the scare with gestational diabetes, but thankfully with diet that has so far been kept at bay. I feel truly blessed by this pregnancy and do not take this blessing lightly. I look at my friend who's having anything but a gentle pregnancy and I definately don't understand why it's her and not me. She's younger, in much better shape than I am and yet she has so much on her plate. PLEASE keep Emily in your prayers. She'll be meeting her youngest daughter soon, very soon.

 

 

                

 

Next week will definately  be a calmer week for me, which I'm glad for! I don't mind being busy, but let me tell you I was really tired today! I know it's from all the walking yesterday and just being out and about at Playmobil. I just had no energy! LOL Let me just say nesting is not something I've had with my 3 previous pregnancies and it's yet to show up with this one! I do have things I need to do to get ready for this little girl. I need to go through all of Jordyn's clothes and wash those up and put them away in her dresser. I want to get a bassinet so that if I'm going about things during the day, I can lay her in that and not worry about one of the boys trying to pick her up. I need to buy my sling/wrap. I will probably have her in that most of the time, but if I have to shower during the day it'd be nice to have a bassinet to put her in. We will not be using a crib, since we cosleep. No need for bottles since she will be getting the REAL thing! I want to order some more cloth diapers, so I'll have to buy some more of those on payday (next Friday). That's about it. I know there's some odds and ends I will need to have around, but for the most part we're ready. She'll be here one way or another if I'm ready or not soon enough!

 

               

 

Oh tomorrow Chad's fixing my van!!! Something went out on the power steering, thankfully it wasn't the pump or the lines, I can't think of what it was but it was less than $40.00 to get the parts, so tomorrow he's going to take it and fix it. We're getting rid of that free car. It's just been a mess. It needed new brakes. Chad's put brakes on every vehicles we've ever owned and never had any issue's, until this darn car. It took Chad and 3 mechanics to get the breaks on and then the emergency  break won't work and here it has to work or they will not let you get it registered! The exhaust pipe has been it's own issue as well and it just comes down to the simple fact that Chad does not have time to work on this thing and get it to where it needs to be. Chad decided to see if someone wanted to buy it, with him being up-front on what needs to be done. Since he put the breaks on it and spent over 8 hours doing that, got the new exhaust pipe (just needs to be put on and the old one taken off) he asked $200.00 for it. It ultimately just pays for what we put in it and the time. Since the lady who gave it to uswas less than honest about it. So hopefully that'll be done and over with this weekend or next week and not our headache anymore. It was nice having a 2nd car, but it's really not necessary and it's shown to be more of a hassle than a blessing. Hopefully the guy who's buying it can get it working. He's not a soldier, but a German citizen..he's the brother in law of one of Chad's soldiers. Chad was completely honest with him about the car so he knows what he's getting. He has a lot more extra time and he will not have the time constraints that we had trying to get it fixed to get it tagged.

 

 

                        

 

Tomorrow it's supposed to rain most of the day and be much cooler (69 for a high!) and next week we're supposed to drop down to the 50's! Insanity I tell you! LOL So much for going swimming like I'd hoped! It'll be way too cold! It's supposed to rain everyday next week as well. Hopefully it'll just rain and finish and we can go out to the park everyday or wait until evening. If not we're going to have to find some activities that can be done inside somewhere, where they can burn energy!

Oh....Tuesday our china cabinets were SUPPOSED to be delivered. They weren't. The furniture truck showed up on post, but didn't have our cabinets in them. Chad went and tracked the drivers down and they didn't have them. So he called the store and she claimed she never told me the 19th. Chad said she promised next Tuesday they'll be delivered. They better be is all I can say, because I don't want to waste another day waiting on them. Our living room furniture she said would be delivered to their warehouse on the 27th, and they'll deliver it to us on July 10th. Why we have to wait almost 2 weeks is beyond me other than there must be a Germany holiday in there besides the 4th of July (although they don't deliver here on Wed. anyways) but either way she told Chad that was a GUARENTEE. He told her if the cabinets were not here next Tuesday and that if the furniture was not here on the 10th, that she better be prepared for a phone call from a VERY VERY ANGRY customer. So we shall see. I really hope it all comes on the dates it's supposed to. It'll be nice to have everythinghere, arranged like we want it before the baby comes. That's a mess I don't need to deal with once she's here that's for sure! Once it's here and I have it all arranged like I want it, I will definately take pictures! The next thing we will be looking into getting are new mattresses. We desperately need them. I'm hoping to take a trip before the baby comes and ordering them, but we'll just have to see what Chad's work schedule is like. Where we are planning on going is open on the weekends (it's on another military base). We have friends there so it'd be great to not just order the matresses, but get to see our friends as well! I'd rather do the trip before the baby comes and hopefully have new mattresses before she comes as well, but we'll have to see!

I know I'm behind on all your alerts. I'm trying! Hopefully tomorrow I'll have a little time on here and can get through quite a few of them!! :) We'll see!

 

All these pictures are from our trip to Triberg, Germany which is in the Black Forest. This is the place to go for Coo-Coo clocks and it's also home of the tallest Water Fall in Germany. It was absolutely beautiful and my pictures just simply do not do it justice!

 

Store front

The front of the store House of 1,000 Clocks

 

bottom of the waterfall (aka the beginning of our trek!)

My parents and the boys at one of the beautiful stops!

I think this picture above and the one before it give you an idea of the power of this waterfall!

Jacob

This was actually a pooled up area here

This s a hotel, it has a beautiful view of the waterfall, when we go back we'd love to stay there if at all possible!!

Chad loved this! :)

I can't remember what building this was, but I thought it was beautiful none the less!

That's it for tonight. I'm off to bed!

Entry #1

Yes, I'm going to do 2 entries in a row. This one is just a summary of our day. It was just such a great day. Tomorrow Chad returns to work after 2 weeks of convelesant leave for his knee surgery. His surgeon has requested that he be seen off post to start physical therapy since the physical therapist here just left and the "new" one is from another post and only comes once a week and they can't see Chad and start him until July 19 or something crazy and rediculous like that! So, tomorrow morning he's going in to sick call to get his profile revised and get a referral off post to a PT. So hopefully that all goes well, say a prayer will you please! We're talking the Army here and well lets just say that like the civilian sector they can be rediculously stupid to the point that you just want to physically cause them HARM!

So, anyways...I got to sleep in until a little after 9 this morning which was nice. Got up and had breakfast. The boys cleaned up the playroom since they left it a mess last night and after that we went over to Engineer Lake and fed the fish, let the boys play, and just had a great time there. They have made it a very educational area with signs up for different wild life, tree's, grasses, etc throughout the area. They found a snail, the tiniest frogs I've ever seen, and when Chad and the boys went into the woods they lifted up a huge piece of wood and found DISGUSTING mice (sooo glad I didn't see them, yuck!), oh and the boys found a "cool beetle"! LOL  When we fed the fish it was awesome! There are always tons of small ones and we've seen a few big ones, but these trout were absolutely HUGE and there were tons of them. They are able to get very big there because there's no fishing allowed there much to Chad and the boys dismay. It would be so nice if they were allowed to do catch and release, but they don't so oh well. We had a great time feeding them and watching the huge ones literally jumping out of the water to get the bread we were throwing in and all the small fish clamoring after the bread before the large ones ate it! Both boys ran, ran, and ran some more!!!

We came home, had lunch. Jack went down for his nap and Jacob did his school work. He did his spelling test (he didn't get his school work done on Friday since we were out all afternoon). He missed one word, so he had to write that out 5 times and then I gave him his new words for the week. I've been doing them in alphabetical order and we were down tothe last 6 letters of the alphabet so instead of his normal 5 words, he has 6 words. Starting next week we'll start over again with new words and go through the alphabet again. It's simply easier for me to do it alphabetically. I don't say them in order come test time, but he's done very well with his spelling tests! He also did reading today. I was going to have him do math, but he just simply did not want to do it and the moment I mentioned math his face fell. So I said he had a choice between math and reading and he JUMPED up with a huge smile on his face and ran and got his book and proclaimed he LOVED to read! LOL So he read. I have him read and then after words I take his book and ask him questions on what he read. To make sure he's reading everything he's supposed to and that he's understanding what he read. He did great on it as normal! When we start back in September he'll be starting small book reports, so I want to make sure over the summer while the school work is VERY light that he is truly  understanding what it is he's reading. We probably won't start the book reports immediately as he needs to be better at spelling, but it's something he knows is coming and as well as he's been doing with spelling tests and reading I think he'll be good. We'll start off with oral reports (longer than what he's been doing right now and without help/questions from me) and once I feel he can write a small report (we're talking a few sentences/short paragraph to start with) then we'll start those. I really don't see him having problems with it because of how well he's been doing so far.

So anyways once he was done with school work, him and Chad goofed off and then Chad took him outside while I waited for Jack to get up from his nap and I just lounged on the couch! It felt good and it was nice to sit in quiet for a while! Once Jack was up we went over to the park. Jackson proceded to get himself grounded from his bike because he road out into the street when he saw a friend of ours come home. So a swift swat from Momma, and I made him get off his bike and we walked over to where we were all sitting and he was told no more bike for the rest of today. He was not happy, but this is about teaching him boundaries and safety and lessons will be learned without serious injury or death being involved. Otherwise they had a great time at the park, we were there for about 2 1/2 hrs and then time for dinner.

Jack had a huge attitude when we went for dinner (we went with a friend of ours to Charley's just a local on post fast food hot sub eatery), so I told him  he was coming home, taking a shower and going directly to bed. He did it without complaining amazingly. He got out of the shower and was actually very happy and no problems going to bed. Thank goodness! Chad read the boys a story and they fell asleep during it!

I do have pictures from today at the lake, but haven't uploaded them onto the computer yet. I'll do that tomorrow. The next post will be pictures, from when my parents were here. :)

Oh tomorrow our china cabinets that go with our new entertainment center is supposed to be delivered!! Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!

Father's Day (part 2)

I wrote the first post this morning before church, so here's how are day was! :)

 

             

 

This morning while Chad got into the shower the boys sat down and made Daddy their Father's Day Cards. It's been a little difficult to sneak that project in since he's home all the time! So we had to wait until this morning! Jacob is VERY artististic and a little perfectionist when it comes to drawing. He spent about 20 minutes on it making sure it was just right. Jack's took about 3 minutes! LOL He was sooo excited though to give it to Daddy and Jacob was too! :) Chad LOVED them and of course said they were MUCH better than any store bought card! They were both made with complete love and devotion! I then told him that his gift was bowling today.

 

                     

We went to church where all the dad's picked a book and a beautiful book mark (I might have to lift that since Mr. Chad rarely reads books!). We had a great sermon on forgiveness. We have the head chaplain and then there are others who are not assigned specifically to the chapel, but assigned to different units. Most of them are "Protestant" ministers so they come to the Protestant service (we range from Baptists, Methodists, Non-Denom, Luthern, etc) so at different times he'll ask another chaplain to give the service, which trust me is such a wonderful gift! The head chaplain is in my opinion very, very seeker friendly and well I don't find that biblical and he likes to do a skit every week, which for me gets old and silly. I like a sermon that makes me think, makes me go home and want to read more of the bible, to learn more. I want to get convicted of sins, I want to walk out of church feeling that I've just heard the word of GOD vs the word of a man wanting to bring in more bodies. I think as a congregation it's our job to reach out to the community, but as a pastor it's their job to speak from the bible. God's words don't need to be light and cheery, no need to perform a skit week after week, I want and know I need to walk out of there feelingconvicted at times, because simply put I'm a sinner and so is every single person in that chapel. Anyways...today was a wonderful change of pace (actually last week too as another chaplain filled in then too).

 

                            

 

Anyways....after the great service we came home and changed into shorts and off to the bowling alley we went. We had lunch there. Their food is actually about the best on this post for take out/fast food so we enjoyed lunch. I didn't feel like bowling (lots of discomfort today from the little miss growing inside of me) so I took care of the score board and was the cheerleader of my guys! They played 3 games. They had a blast! Chad said he'd like to start going at least once or twice a month (bowling). I know the boys would love it. It's something we can all do as a family or if I'm not up to it, they can go do together. They can opt for as many games as they want too. Since it was Father's Day shoe rental was free and the games were each $1.00 per person per game...so it cost $9.00! I'd say we walked out of there with a very cheap gift! Those are the best gifts though...the ones that don't cost a lot, and everyone has a great time! Family time is one of the most important things to Chad and I. The boys thrive having it and we know how important it is and that as the boys get older these days will be harder to do. Plus add in those pesky little 12-18 month deployments the Army requires...making the most of the time we have together is all the more important!

 

                                                                      

We came home and just lounged around. Ok actually Chad and I both took a nap while Jacob played on the computer and Jack watched Alice in Wonderland! I slept for about an hour and Chad slept for about 2 1/2 hrs.

 

                    

 

Chad requested chili for dinner (it's been in the 70's here so it was do-able). I got the chili going and when Chad woke up we actually did some cleaning! Yep I made the man help me clean on Father's Day! LOL Hey if I could do it on Mother's Day he could do it on his day! LOL It wasn't much. I put all 3 baskets of clothes away (sorted out the boys had them put away theirs and then I put mine up, Chad's are still waiting for him to put away!) Chad vacuumed the living room and dining room and he swept the hall way. So like I said it wasn't much, just a little cleaning! While we were finishing up my friend buzzed up to see if the boys could go to the park with her and her son (and baby girl) we told her sure and that we'd be out soon. We finished up our cleaning (about 10 minutes) and joined her for about 2 hrs! We came inside and the chili was perfect!! We boiled up the hot dogs and had our chili! Dinner was great! It's been months since we've had chili and it definately hit the spot! The boys went to bed with no problems. Which isn't unusual. They're normally pretty worn out by bedtime the way it is.

     

                     

 

Chad thanked me for such a great day and we have plans to go for a walk over to the lake that's here on post tomorrow. The hot dog buns we had went moldy (it's been a little humid here and bread goes bad so fast here when the humidity hits so we now have to start keeping it in the fridge for the rest of the summer). So we're going to take the bread over to the lake and feed the fish and any ducks that may be there and then let the boys play. They have really cool things for kids to do there. Hopefully there won't be a lot of other people there. Now with school out and it's a 4 day weekend there's a chance of people BBQ'ing there, but either way it'll be nice to have a break from our normal routine! It's a nice little walk over there so the extra excercise will be good and I'm sure the boys will bike over there and that will hopefully help get some extra energy out!

 

                               

I'm so happy it's summer! I just love the carefree days of summer. We do less school work in the summer, spend so much more time outside, and laughter and smiles just seem to pop out constantly!

 

Well, although it's now officially 12:05 am here in Germany it's not Father's Day...but I'll say it anyways...Happy Father's Day 2007!

 

 

Happy Father's Day

 

To All The Dad's Out there.....Happy Father's Day

 

This year Chad will once again have a Daddy's girl to spoil. He was an amazing Daddy to Jordyn. She became a BIG Daddy's girl the last couple months of her life, and as hard as it was for me, Chad needed and deserved that time where he had her utmost adirmation and devotion. He loved being a Daddy to a girl and although we're ALWAYS be Jordyn's parents, we don't get to parent her. So it's truly a special year that we once again will welcome a daughter into our family.

 

This last graphic makes me think of Chad and our boys. Chad LOVES to go fishing and the boys definately have this love as well! I'm blessed to have a good husband and a man who's an amazing Dad. I think it's become common place for people to put men down, we seem to forget that woman are just as bad if not at times worse than men from parenting to being a spouse to just being cruddy people. Men have a lot of pressure on them, just as much pressure as women. Men just have a different sort of pressure. Instead of celebrating these differences we put them down. For this next week I'm setting a goal for myself and challenge each of you reading this to do the same....if you're married or even divorced or have a significant other (if not then do it about your own father)...I'm going to share something good about Chad and my own dad.

 

I haven't mentioned my own dad. He has always been a hard working man. We grew up comfortable for the most part. We were middle class, they were able to get for the most part what they needed and most the time wanted. We had a nice home, clothes, and opportunities to do things. For the most part I had a fun childhood. My dad grew up as a Farmer's Son, and his father was for the most part a no nonsense kind of man. I didn't ever know my grandfather I have about 2 memories of him, but he wasn't the same man they grew up with. He loved his family, but he expected them to do as they were told and not question him. He had 12 children, a loving wife, and a lot of work to do daily...you didn't have time for your kids to argue with you or be opinionated! Amusingly I think all my dad's siblings (including my dad) are VERY opinionated. They had a good life as well. I grew up for the majority of my childhood out in the country. We ran around during the summers out in the pasture down to the creek, playing in the water. We were "forced" to work in the garden, take care of the animals, mow the yard, help with house hold chores, but still had a pretty carefree childhood. My dad worked at (still does) Goodyear Tire Plant. He worked 2 and 3rd shift most of my childhood, when I was in high school he was finally on Day's. While in Jr High I think he always worked 2nd shift, because I don't have any memories of him being able to go to any school events (sports, etc). We saw him on the weekends. It's the way it was. He had to make a living and he did it. He didn't complain. He just did it. He didn't like missing out on his family, but he had to provide for us. During the summer's we obviously saw him a lot more. He was there in the morning, and then on his way to work he'd drop us off at the pool, we'd get to be there for about 3 hrs a day and then Mom would pick us up when she got off of work. (We lived in a small town so if we ever misbehaved at the pool our butt's were in sooooo much trouble! LOL).

So to all the hard working Dad's, to all the loving Dad's. Happy Father's Day. No one is perfect but there's so many who truly cherish their children. I've been blessed with a wonderful husband who's a wonderful dad. A dad who was a great dad, and a maternal grandpa who absolutely adores us (to this day...my dad's dad died when I was 3), and all the men who were extra "Dad's" and "Grandpa's" in my life....oh how blessed I've been with the men in my life!

Chad and our boys

Our boys and my Dad in May during their visit here to Germany!